Monday, November 5, 2012

LIVE for one night only, Tim (me) will be a guest blogger!

   Yes, that's right, I was invited to guest blog, either Heidi didn't want to type, or figured ya'll needed a good laugh rather than the downers of being prego and living in the desert, so your stuck with me for the next little stretch, hopefully you're not thinking you just wasted "X" number of minutes off your life at the end.

So where to start.....we have a countdown!!  15 days till the baby is here 30 days till we move in, and neither can get here fast enough!!  Heidi is getting bigger and bigger by the day, which I know is easy to say "she's prego, what do you expect...." but NO, literally, we took 'bump' pictures a week apart, and she is HUGE!  She went to the doc last week and was telling him how the baby keeps kicking her in the ribs (she has a bruise across the top of the bump from the baby kicking), and the doc looked her over, figured out where the head, butt, and feet were, and then proceeded to tell her "you have a LONG baby in there!"  not quite sure where "it" gets that gene!  Willow has been running her ragged around the house, A) Willow is getting fast and playful B) momma is getting slow and irritable; bad combo, I never know if I'm going to come home to happy to see me prego wife and happy daughter, or The Exorcism Part VIII: GET THIS BABY OUT OF ME AND THE 2 YEAR OLD TOO! We are practicing being that 90 year old couple right now since we just have the "little" queen bed, and prego needs 47 pillows to make a nest to sleep in.  Seriously, she has 6 pillows and 4 couch cushions arranged just perfectly so she can get comfortable, the baby doesn't rest on her guts wrong and make it hard to sleep, and she can actually get up when it is time too.  Last week (and the week prior) she made this nest on the couch, I traded this week, and must say, other than hanging off from my knees down, it's pretty comfortable (a problem Heidi would know nothing about).  The down side to the couch is you can't lock people out!  Willow has this internal 0500 alarm clock and wants to share the morning with EVERYBODY so she'll creep up to the couch, get right in your face, and stare at you for a while until you open your eyes and jump cause she's 4 inches from your face, or she'll eventually smack ya with a shoe or her hand; the later not being a cool way to wake up.  We can't complain too much though, she goes down (or at least to bed) at 2000; sometimes doesn't fall asleep for 2 hours, but usually stays down for the whole night.  Needless to say everybody is ready for nap time on the weekends when she does this, momma often takes naps with the babies during the week, daddy goes to bed by 2030 or 2100 often.  We're old!

We went to a new church this weekend.  We had been seeing window stickers all around the desert "C.C.V." and kept wondering what it was?  Was it the new Body by Vi cult?  The next pyrmid scheme?  Some political clique that we weren't aware of?  So anyways I was having a conversation at work with a few people and somehow we crossed into religion (one of two taboo subjects I rarely discuss with co-workers next to politics) but we did anyway.  Come to find out C.C.V. is a big church around here.  We had just been talking about how we didn't know if we fit in at the church we had been going to, it just didn't feel like OUR church, and we got kinda tired of hearing about money this, money that, give give give give give every week.  Heidi made fun of me for knocking it at first cause we were in a converted gym, it echoed, the band was kinda corny, no pews, no hymnals, no stained glass.  We went to the "Fall Festival" on Halloween with Willow which was a blast, they did put on a good gig for this, half a dozen blow up bounce houses and giant slides, "Trunk or Treat" for the kids, games, cupcake walk, music, food, and fun for all.  Willow figured out this candy thing REAAAALL fast!  She had a 1 gallon ice cream bucket decorated for Christmas to go with her Desert Snowman costume with her pink boots.  Every now and then we tried to sneak a piece out of her bucket and she immediately felt the weight difference or something and turned around yelling at is "NO, NO, NO, NO, NOOOO...." until we put it back; leaving was not cool.  We tried to hold her bucket so she could play chance, so just muscled that bucket, full bucket, around but she was not going to let loose the death grip for one second.  So anyways, we went to the new church this weekend and were both very impressed, it felt like home, people talked to us, the kids area was great!, I'm pretty sure L.L. Cool J was the leader of the band, and they started out by singing a Police song (S.O.S.), they had a Starbucks in the church (not the selling point, but it was pretty funny), and a full service deli that they treated us to lunch at after the service, again not the selling point, but was still pretty cool.  No, the sermon, as my friend at work was telling me, was taking a story from the Bible, and relating it to current events; this weekend it was the story of Elijah, it was very uplifting, and neat to hear in this perspective.  There still weren't any pews, hymnals, or stained glass, but it felt right, the people were nice, we got a call from the pastor, and they didn't mention money or politics once.

The house is feeling more like a house now that drywall is up and painted, the stucco on the exterior is up and painted, cabinets and light fixtures are in, and the roof is on, the only problem now is they lock it at the end of the day so nobody can go in and mess anything up (is what I like to think vs. trying to keep us out so we can't poke around and bitch about things we find as they're doing it.)  While I like that they committed to a done date finally (not as soon as we had hoped, but it's something), I am still conflicted with, and have voiced my bitches, about our salesman, our design center ^%D$$!*, and the lack of craftsmanship.  I won't go into detail as it will only get me fired up again, but unfortunately or fortunately (depending on which side of the fence your on) I know just enough to be dangerous about some of this stuff.  Trim, cabinetry, doors, windows, etc.  Whatever, they'll fix some things when we walk through, they probably won't get an advertisement worthy glowing review from me, and they will be back OFTEN once we're in to fix things for as long as I am told our initial warranty is good for.  We went last weekend to a pool company to discuss plans for a pool; bad idea with Heidi and a 2 year old.  3 hours later we got out of there knowing this was not who we were going to use.  Lame salesman, I won't get into that, I could rant for another 4 pages about that cro-mag with a bad moustache and hair coloring.  The equipment was not as good as one company I spoke with, he wasn't listening to anything we said about "...keep chuggin' on working on the pool, we can worry about the yard later..." no, he wanted to plot out the whole yard like he was playing Farmville, with fruit trees and all (and yes, we know they were fruit trees cause he actually farted around putting oranges on them in his autocad, despite telling him, "...yeah yeah yeah, let's get back to the pool..."

Going to the store the other night we're in the center turn lane of an island waiting to turn into a shopping center (left), and the car facing us has his brights on.  I turn slightly to target him a little better and bright him, and the ol' fart flips ME off!!  Heidi didn't tell me that part till it was too late to go tell him what dusty hole he could put that finger in, and it kinda stuck in my craw the rest of the night that somebody got a flip up on me.

Last week we thought our fridge here died; called the landlord and he had one on order and being delivered before I could assess it.  Old one just needed a good thawing and cleaning, but it was too late to cancel the order.  New Uncle Bill (Landlord) was fine with it; this one is old anyways, and if it is still working he's cool cause he's always wanted a fridge for his garage.  We got a new fridge with a working ice maker and water dispenser, which is uber cool since water out of the tap is about 85 degrees on cold here in the desert.  On that note Heidi has been shrinking all my clothes washing them with warm to hot water :(

Willow is starting to realize a baby is coming, she knows where the baby is, she has been feeding and taking her baby doll for walks, and trying to suck every ounce of our attention now, like she knows that she's going to have to share it in a few weeks.  She use to be very independent and entertain herself; now she has to be on our hip 24/7.  Bath's here with glass tub doors suck; needless to say she has learned (like it or not) how to take showers with us.  We also started swimming lessons a few weeks ago with her, Heidi had been doing it up until this week at which point I took over; something about Heidi not being able to move in the pool with a 2 year old.  It's fun, but she's SOOOOoooo independent that she wants to have fun rather than do the lessons that she's suppose too.  She does love the water and for that I am grateful, I just want to make sure she can swim before we get a pool or go to the lake, or whatever.

Paid off the truck this month  WHOOOO HOooooOOOOOOO! So now momma has a little extra dough to furnish, paint, design, etc. around the new pad, or daddy gets a pool and a Mini Cooper, jury still out on this.

Went to a co-workers Saturday night for hangin' by the pool with a nice cigar, watchin' some football, enjoyin' some food, and having fun.  Heidi and Willow enjoyed themselves too, some other kids there, lots of new people to meet and get to know the area from for Heidi; very refreshing camaraderie and good people that I/we can hang out with at work and outside of work, and people Heidi can ahgn with and have something to talk about too (kids, the desert, food, homes, gyms, churches, etc.)  They lived in a gated community in North Scottsdale (Fountain Hills I think), pulled up the the guard shack and the name placard posted for the guy on duty was Mr. Schart, I ain't schartin' ya, it really was!!

Saw a '57 Chevy golf cart, VW Beetle, Hummer, John Deere, Jeep, Cadilac, and many other humorous golf carts running around here lately; the Snow Birds are here!!!!!

Well, I think I'm finally about out of things to say for now, if I'm lucky, or if by popular demand, maybe I'll get called back for an encore guest appearance, if not, you all need to stay on Heidi to blog more often!

Peace Out!!

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